the secret lives of dentists (2002). directed by alan rudolph.

we imagine crazy things in moments of anger, jealousy; emotions, just to name a few. when angry at a spouse, we imagine not talking to them for days in the hope that they would notice and ask us first, what is wrong. we do that to friends, to family, to parents. we want to be noticed, to be acknowledged. it is part of being loved.

this is one of my favorite stories. it is obvious now that i have too many favorites. it's a story of a family man who suspects his wife of infidelity, while he has no credible proof of it, he is haunted by immense jealousy. both of them are dentists who work at a thriving practice. he sways between wanting to believe that nothing really happened, at the same time the feeling of rage is eating him alive - and made worse by a mysterious alter ego who is determined to feed his suspicions.

i like it that the movie is shot in a domestic setting - such that - this person who is experiencing tumultuous emotions of a possible betrayal - had to deal with bringing up three little girls and all the issues associated with making a family and a marriage work. he has no luxury of time and space to speak to his wife about his suspicions which is fast turning into an obsession - with both of them working, the children sick, and the youngest girl being overly attached to him. he has no choice but hide his anger when around the family. he wants her to talk to him about it - dropping hints here and there - but no reaction whatsoever.

the point is - if you have something in your mind, spill it out, now.

i like the nuanced performance by campbell scott and hope davis - watching this movie is like having a camera in front of a family facing family challenges - like all families out there do, everyday. there is one scene in which the family falls sick one by one, the parents were at their wits end trying to hold everything together. when the children finally recover, it's their turn to get sick. a more recent film that explores the same theme, blue valentine (2010) arrives to a bleaker conclusion - that a struggling relationship can not work against a mountain of difficulties in the face of domestic demands.

i prefer to think, that despite anything, if we work hard enough, and still want the same things at the end of the day, we can work it out. i like this story - it's about two people who want the same things, despite everything. i find that comforting.